Have the Courage to Let Go of What You Can't Change

Rain. Rain is needed to sustain life, and unfortunately in many parts of the world, rain is very scarce at the moment. While many people pray for rain, in June of 2019, I found myself doing quite the opposite. Why? Because the week of my wedding, a tropical front moved in from Texas, and traveled along the entire Southeast for over 5 days. June 7, 8 (wedding day), and 9 called for 100% chance of rain. They say rain is good luck on your wedding day, but I honestly didn't care. I did NOT want it to rain on our beautiful outdoor ceremony that I had planned and dreamed of for a year and a half.

"When a knot becomes wet, it becomes extremely hard to untie."

This is what I kept telling myself to help calm my nerves at the thought of a tropical storm moving through on my wedding weekend. Trent (my husband) and I, have a connection that is hard to untie. Whether it was the most beautiful day, or one where we needed an ark, at the end of that day, Trent and I would be husband and wife. However, everything is always easier said than done. Despite multiple family members and coworkers doing their best to assure me everything would be OK, I was a nervous wreck.

Fast-forward four months, I found myself still being a nervous wreck over things I can't control. I can be a bit impulsive, and decided I needed a tattoo to remind me that sometimes we just need to let go of what we can't control. I scheduled my appointment for the end of October at Haylo Healing Arts Lounge in Plaza Midwood (who did an amazing job). The tattoo is a reminder, but as mentioned above, it is sometimes easier to say things, than to actually follow through and do them.

Last week my grandma passed away after almost 87 years of an amazing life on this earth. I am not one to ever talk about feelings, and I especially don't want to talk about a death in the family. Keeping true to myself, I am not going to sit here and express my feelings about this difficult time in my life and my families lives, but I am more mentioning to not sugarcoat everything that will be discussed in this blog. I do travel, I do have a great job, I do have my health, I do have a great family, I do have many wonderful opportunities, but everything is not always what it appears to be on social media. Life happens, and it sometimes is not as glamorous as Instagram and Facebook tends to show. For this life lesson, I don't want to say I am "letting go", because it will sound like I am forgetting all of our memories, but I do need to understand, that this is a part of life I can't control, and learn how to accept that.

In case you thought I left you hanging about what actually happened on our wedding day, think again. After a week of crying and worrying about something that ultimately I could not control, and in the grand scheme of things, didn't even matter, we had the prefect wedding. Friday night at our rehearsal dinner at NoDa Brewing, the skies cleared and the sun even came out. The wedding party and our families were able to sit outside and take photos out on the patio. Saturday morning, the day of the wedding, I woke up to blue skies and that yellow ball of fire in the sky, something I didn't think I would see, the sun. On the drive to the venue, the sky began to be covered with clouds, but the forecast kept pushing back the rain and the chance of rain continued to drop. The ceremony was set to begin at 5:30 pm, and as clouds began to roll in, I called Trent at 5:15 pm and asked "Are we going inside or outside?", where he replied, "What do you mean? We planned an outdoor ceremony, we're having an outdoor ceremony." Not more than 2 minutes after we said, "I do" and turned to walk down the aisle as husband and wife, and guests followed, the skies unleashed. It POURED during cocktail hour, but then cleared again for the remainder of the night. We could not have asked for a more prefect day.

All of this to say, we have to let go of what we can't change. It can be hard, upsetting, frustrating, and completely disappointing, but we can't control it. Life happens, and it is not always up to us how or when it happens. I need to constantly remind myself of this. My tattoo is a symbol, and a reminder to have the courage to let go of what you can't change.